Her Ladyship

Notes from the gutter.

Monday, December 20, 2004

Bloody stumps

Sweet jesus am I in pain. It's all because of these bitches: http://www.zappos.com/n/es/d/722026786/c/13827/aff/125744.html. For those of you too lazy to click over, it's a pair of Donald Pliner "Space" sneaks. Mine are khaki/beige with a kicky racing stripe. They are very spiffy. Unfortunately, they are also made of leather. Meaning that they need to be broken in. Until that happens, I'll be leaving a trail of blood on all my socks. And I *wish* I was exaggerating.

This is why I waited so long to replace my other shoes, to the point where I had holes so big that all my socks were getting ruined from the rough pavement around my apartment. I knew, though, that if I showed up at my parents' house with holey shoes, my mom would have a fit and not let me into the house until I had an acceptable pair on. So I decided to be proactive and buy shoes before I got there. Off to the InterWeb I went.

My arches are higher than normal, which makes fitting into most shoes painful and guarantees me a life of calluses. Trust me, I know there are worse ailments to have. But sometimes it's so frustrating to search for a pair of shoes that won't cripple you, much less look attractive. And it's not even my predilection for high heels causing this. I have returned flats to Comfort Zone and Easy Spirit - two stores whose whole business model revolves on how comfortable their shoes are supposed to be - because they were poking holes in my poor feet.

Sidenote: Do NOT get me started on (male) people who jauntily claim that women wear painful shoes because they accept them and that it's merely the market reflecting demand. I opened a can of whup-ass on the last fool who said that to me.

Anyway, I am going to wear the Donald Pliners on Wednesday for my flight home, because my only other pair of cold-weather shoes are my boots and I'm fairly certain they'll set off the metal detectors. I don't think that the DPs have any metal in them. Guess I'll find out. Because there is no freaking way I'm taking them off to go through security - putting them on is the worst part and I'd just as soon not sob like a little girl in public. Cross your fingers for me.


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