My cell phone is plotting against me - UPDATE

That's the only explanation for its continued obstinance in randomly calling people. You don't know mortified until you've looked down at your bag while swilling back drinks during happy hour and realized that your phone has opted to call a work contact. I should start number-locking my cell phone, but that would slow down my already lame ability to respond to its ringing, and we can't have that. Instead, I've deleted all non-social phone numbers from the cell's list, so that I can at least do damage control when it decides to independently start dialing numbers again.

I hate this cell phone. It doesn't work when I'm more than three feet from a window, I can only dream of using it on the metro, and don't get me started on its ability to unerringly drop a call during a crucial moment.

The only reason why I keep this service - which I won't mention by name, but Catherine Zeta-Jones certainly doesn't have a problem in doing so - is that you can use it abroad. That's suprisingly handy. Also unsurprisingly expensive. Last year, when I was on vacation in Malta, calling the States cost $2.99/minute. But of course no price is too much for keeping in contact with the ones you love, right? Wrong. I called my then-boyfriend every day for 5-10 minutes, largely because I am an idiot. When he rather spectacularly and unexpectedly dumped me a few weeks later, salt was added to the wound by the arrival of a cell phone bill for $200+ from the period when I was in Malta. Not that I am still bitter or anything.

UPDATE: Hot Pants Esq. reports that my phone apparently read this post and decided to up the ante. Previously, when it's rung people, it did so because it got jostled while I was walking. Not this time. Yesterday, it called her - while it was sitting, motionless, at my desk.

Okay, bitch, this is war.