Her Ladyship

Notes from the gutter.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

If I had a band...

...this would totally be my band's name: "Surprise Shellfish." Or possibly "Mollusk Munitions."

This is from an article in the Feb. 16, 2005, issue of The Philadelphia Inquirer: "Army Is Fishing For Ammo; Old grenades made their way to clamshell driveways."

Apparently, WWI-era French and British hand grenades were dumped decades ago off the coast of New Jersey. The ordnance got incorporated in with clams. Dredging outfits brought up clamshells, which were then put in driveways in Delaware, Maryland, and Virginia. Now the Army Corps of Engineers is spending $6 million to investigate the matter and may end up spending twice that.

This is a frigging great story, all around, and most journalists would've reported just the facts. But not Steve Goldstein. He managed to slip in "surprise shellfish" and "mollusk munitions" in a very casual and yet snarkily entertaining way, and warned readers that they are about to be "shell-shocked." Hats off, my good man.


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